During the day I am a mom to 4 kids, and a great wife to my husband, if I do say so myself! I am the chef, the housekeeper, queen of the DVR, homeworker helper, and I play so many other roles. And during that time, and at night, I am also a Romance Consultant. Yep, I do “those parties” to help couples spice up their love lives and help single ladies spoil themselves.
I have been doing parties since 2008. I love what I do. I can tell you that the one thing that I am asked A LOT is, “What can I do to change my sex life?”
It is simple.
The first thing, I always say, is that you have to have communication within the bedroom. That is the biggest thing for every relationship. Both you and your partner need to have conversations about what you each like, need, desire and want. Without that, you run into not knowing what each person wants or is needing.
Do not be nervous or scared to tell your partner what you like, or need more of. Trust me, talking about your needs and wants will open doors for you and your partner in the bedroom, which leads to more happiness outside of the bedroom.
You know that fresh-faced, wide-smiling the next day, more energy, happiness at work, and the cute text messages throughout the day and flirting while making dinner feeling? All after a night of fun in the bedroom? Versus a week without sex, and attitudes are everywhere.
We all have heard the saying “sex is a big part of any relationship”. Good communication behind the bedroom doors bleeds into the rest of the relationship. So what happens if you are a busy mom, and having a romance is the last thing on your mind?
Ok ladies, let’s keep it real for a moment. If you had a To Do List for the day, and sex had to be on that list. Where would you place it? In the top slot, in the morning before you wake up your kids for the day? The middle, as soon as your partner gets home from work, after homework and right before dinner and baths? Or after the struggle of trying to clean the kitchen after dinner, bath time, putting the kids to bed, after the millionth time of your toddler coming into your room, asking for milk in their sippy cup?
I bet just by reading that you are trying to figure it out in your head. Trust me, it happens. We are mothers and we are human. Romance and intimacy tend to fall low on our To Do List because we have so many other things on our minds. But ladies, Romance and keeping it spicy is such a HUGE thing in any relationship, especially with having kids.
By the end of the day, sex is sometimes the last thing on my mind. I get it, trust me. Between the kids, cooking, school, cleaning, my business, paying bills, running errands, etc. Whew, that is a lot.
Romance and taking time for your relationship doesn’t have to be a lot of effort. It can be something small as a massage, playing a game together, watching a show together, taking a shower together.
We as women tend to make sure that our kids are well dressed, makeup is on point, our shoes match our clothes, our hair is done right, our car smells good, and so many other things during the day. We want to make sure we are taking time out of every day to spend quality time with our partner.
Me and my hubby have a rule: even if it is only 5 minutes of us talking, we make sure we make that time for each other. Most days we can get in more than 5 minutes without interruption from the kids. I value that time with him.
Make time for romance, which leads to a very good sex life!!
What are some ways you make sure to make room for romance in your life? Let me know in the comments below!