My husband and I can spot a first-time parent pretty much in an instant. We look at them with their exhausted eyes, frazzled hair, and overall what-the-heck-am-I-doing look on their face. They’re the ones with the shopping cart covers perfectly in place for their easy-going trip around Target or Costco.
First time parents have the diaper bag that’s so full it probably wouldn’t be allowed on an overhead compartment of an airplane because it’s so big. And they have all the time in the world to do things…they just don’t realize it yet, because life seems overwhelming at the moment.
Then there’s me. The third-time mom who lets her kids eat something that fell on the floor well past the five-second rule, and who’s pretty sure she caught the middle child licking the stroller wheel the other day…but that’s another story for a different day. Me, the one who used to judge others (before kids) for how messy a kid’s face was, only to have mine completely disgusting before 8am.
If you’re trying to find me, I’ll be at Target; you can spot me, because I’ll be the one yelling for one kid to come back to the shopping cart, while simultaneously praying the other one will just sit down in the cart and not try to eat the hand soap I just put in there, all while staring longingly at the adorable one baby sitting patiently in their cute shopping cart cover. I also routinely forget the diaper bag essentials; I call it a good day if I can find a diaper and a snack of some sort in my purse. *Bonus points if the diaper actually fits the child who needs it.
Can any other moms of multiples relate or am I just a little too easy-going in this parenting business?
We decided to go a little crazy and switch things up a little this time around. With my first two kids (the first one especially), we were (…okay I was) terrified about nipple confusion, so when she didn’t take a pacifier after a few attempts, we just called it a day and washed our hands of using them.
But then strangers would stare at us with those judgmental eyes, and people would call us out when she’d cry (which was basically all the time), and ask us if we had a pacifier (to shut her up). We somehow made it through that lack-of-paci phase unscathed—except for a few broken eardrums, of course.
Our second kid followed suite, and we skipped the pacifiers. She didn’t care or cry as much, thank goodness, since I didn’t have the energy to keep tabs of a half dozen pacifiers around the house.
This third baby is a game changer, though. He wails, loudly, and once he’s been fed, I can’t even put him on the boob, because he’s already full and doesn’t want it anymore—plus, nursing as a pacifier isn’t possible all the time since we have the other two rascals running around—instead, a pacifier is the way to go.
We pop that sucker in there, and it’s pure magic: he stops crying and totally calms down almost instantly.
Once we realized he’d take one, and stopped worrying about nipple confusion—which I now realize is silly, because the pacifier isn’t a boob, and he’s already realized that a pacifier won’t feed him—we ran out and bought several more to have on hand…always. I may not have the right sized diapers or wipes in my diaper bag, but I’ll sure as heck have a pacifier ready.
Long story short: the more kids I have the more I’m learning to enjoy and appreciate the little things…like the sound of silence. And let me tell you; I’m very much enjoying not having a crying baby all the time. I love that he’s able to soothe himself with the help of a little pacifier. Bonuses to him using it: my daughters love being big helpers by giving him his “pass-ee-fire.” Plus, I’m sleeping at night more than I did with either of my other kids.
Seriously, where has this been all our lives?
Did/do your kids take a pacifier? Were you hesitant to give one at first, or did you pop it in there and never look back?